"Lolita is not about love, because love is always mutual; Lolita is about obsession, which is never, ever love, and Nabokov himself was so disappointed that people did not understand this and take away the right message… For how could anyone call this feeding frenzy of selfishness, devouring, and destruction “love”?"
In her preface to LOLITA, Mary Gaitskill reflects on a review by Vanity Fair’s Gregor von Rezzori in which he calls the novel: “The only convincing love story of the century.” (via devendrabanhart)

I dreamt that Anette had a blackjack addiction and kept borrowing money from me and to pay off her debt I had to work as a lollipop man in Glasgow and had to wear boxes for shoes

do you ever just have so much you need to remember and do that your brain stops working and you just walk around feeling like a lobotomised otter

snorlaxatives:

i don’t trust people who can fall asleep with jeans on

inbox:

I’m a teenager why does my back hurt I’m not 70 years old

urgh i have to wake up in 4 hours to go to set and i can’t sleep because it’s too warm and everything is uncomfortable and i dreamt that moby left me some sort of cryptic message and when i finally deciphered it it was just his face like:

"What are you doing?"

"Let me just step here. Now here. Oh, I bet that hurt. Now let me put my butt down here. Oh, yeah, that’s the stuff."

  • Me: This wine tastes like shit.
  • Me: Yes, I would like more.

why is the us air force emailing me

i’m a 18 year old girl from europe who hasn’t seen daylight in weeks

i think you can do better

Random girl: Oh, you’re listening to the Who! I love the Who!

Me: Yeah, what’s your favourite song?

Random girl: Umm… I think definitely Teenage Wasteland.

creepingmalaise:

My co-worker sent an email saying he would be late because he was trying to untie a squirrel tail knot. I asked for a picture, and he delivered.This is the email he sent:
 I was pressed into squirrel rescue this morning on my way out. 5 young squirrels got tangled in Christmas lights in my neighbor’s yard. We got the lights off, but now their tails are one big knot, so I have to bring them into a rescue place to untie them, as I am unequipped to untie squirrel tail knots. I should be in this afternoon.

creepingmalaise:

My co-worker sent an email saying he would be late because he was trying to untie a squirrel tail knot. I asked for a picture, and he delivered.
This is the email he sent:

I was pressed into squirrel rescue this morning on my way out. 5 young squirrels got tangled in Christmas lights in my neighbor’s yard. We got the lights off, but now their tails are one big knot, so I have to bring them into a rescue place to untie them, as I am unequipped to untie squirrel tail knots. I should be in this afternoon.
  • Me: I feel I swear worse than a sailor.
  • Me: I mean, what the fuck is up with that...

My relationship with homework:

Me:

Homework:

Me:

Homework:

Me:

Homework:

Me:

Write a pro-gay comment

Get more “thumbs down” than “thumbs up”.

My reaction:

I mean, why would you be against people loving each other and being happy?