When my mum tried to explain how to use the internet over the phone:
GOD DAMN IT CAT ARE YOU WATCHING PUSSY VIDEOS AGAIN YOUR INTERNET ADDICTION IS SERIOUSLY GETTING OUT OF CONTROL
i’m genuinely confused and worried
what do people do when they aren’t addicted to the internet
seriously what do you do with so much free time
Mum: Can you come off the computer and help me with something?
Me: But, mum, I haven’t reached the end of my dash yet.
Mum: Oh, okay, when you’re finished then.
Me:
Me today
10 am:
time to eat
11 am:
internet
1 pm:
time to sleep
3 pm:
youtube
4 pm:
food
5 pm:
sleep
8 pm:
why am i so productive today i can't take it
Me: Yes.
The test hasn't started ye
Me: Yes.
No, you have to take the test before.
Me:
Me:
Me: Yes.
Dad: “I’m leaving for a few days so like… don’t burn the house down.”
Me:
Dad: But be home when the cable guy comes, I think we’ll get faster internet after he’s finished.
Me:
When someone asks if you do any sports:
Me: *remembers something that needs to checked on the internet*
Me: *opens new tab*
Me: *opens tumblr*
Me: *brain processing action*
Me:
Me:
Me: What did I just do?
Me: No...
Me: But a test on the internet did tell me that I'd make an excellent evil supervillain.
Mum:
Mum: I guess that's good...
Seeing a cute guy on the internet:
Seeing that he likes the same films as you:
Seeing that he likes the same music as you:
Seeing that he lives on the other side of the country:
Being home sick and having no internet
Internet, where are all those cute, funny and nerdy guys you always keep telling us about?
Internet:
Dear random 36-year-olds who keep sending me friend invites,
So, come here often?
(I started studying but then I thought: Hey, why not flirt with the internet?)
